Presenting Issue: Bored of Life
Emotional balance is within our grasp.
Depression or fear of being happy?
Do you struggle with boundaries and knowing what is good for you? Sometimes, when we're excited, a lack of awareness of our own needs and wants can lead us to act rashly. When we regret the consequences of our actions, we can be left with a fear of being truly happy. Our subconscious mind has internalised that being happy = poor decision making and so we avoid being happy to avoid being sad!
*Name changed to protect the client's anonymity.
When Sally* came to see me, she had been feeling low for some time. Changes in life circumstances and a recent traumatic experience left her feeling despondent and unable to do anything for herself. While she was able to keep up appearances and always seemed to be doing things for others, when left to her own devices, she would stay in bed all day, every day. She had lost her appetite for living.
She came to the process with much enthusiasm, but was worried that it might work too well and that she would be drawn into such a carefree state of mind that she would inevitably make rash decisions.
It transpired that she had had depression many years before and the therapy process that she underwent at that time had left her in a ’high’ state, no longer depressed, but emotionally unbalanced nevertheless, and prone to making decisions that were a bit rushed.
The initial process involved some emotional house clearing that helped her to let go of old ideas and we worked on empowering her to be confident in identifying her needs and wants, an essential part of the act of self care, and crucial to getting into balance with the self.
As we continued to work together, we honed in on the part of her that was responsible for emotional balance, showing her that she didn't need to be afraid of being happy, that we have the power to enjoy our lives while being discerning about our actions and grounded in what we do, the key is to really listen to ourselves.
The final session we spent some time revisiting some of the life-events that had triggered the depressive mood and worked on letting go of the desire for any of those things to be different.